"Begin today and write in it your goings and comings, your deepest thoughts, your achievements and your failures, your associations and your triumphs, your impressions and your testimonies. I promise you that if you will keep your journals and records, they will indeed be a source of great inspiration to you, each other, your children, your grand-children and others throughout the generations. Remember, the Savior chastised those who failed to record important events." --President Spencer W. Kimball

February 2, 2012


Today when I got to the hospital, Stacey was so excited to tell me that baby Katea had a surprise for me.....I LOVE surprises so I was anxious to see what it was....as I walked into her room, I scanned around and didn't really notice anything different.  I looked at Stacey all confused and she told me that they switched her oxygen to wall-flow.....which means low-flow, scant flow....100% oxygen, the kind she's going to come home on!  At first I was so excited, but then I got scared.  I just kept thinking over and over that her eyes aren't mature yet and I've been told over and over that it's the oxygen that damages the eyes....how could she be on 100% oxygen if her eyes aren't mature yet?  She told me that baby was only on 1/16th liter of 100% oxygen, and they were watching her saturations really really closely making sure she doesn't high-sat too much.  As long as her saturations stayed within the parameters of 88-94, she would be fine.  How exciting!  She's always been a yo-yo'ing type of baby....she'll go super high on her saturations, and then dip really low in just seconds....she's always been one to make the nurses chase her....lol (a lot of personality already...hahaha)  But, the changing of her oxygen to the scant seemed to help her be more stable, which was so nice.  The move to scant flow also eliminates the Fi02....now if she needs a little help, they adjust the flow from the 1/16th to how ever much she needs.  What a great surprise!

The decision to do that was made by the neonatalogist, to help get her home sooner.  Originally the plan was to wait until her eye-exam on Monday, and if her eyes were mature, they would switch her over to the scant flow....where she would need to be monitored for 24-48 hours before she could actually go home.  By switching her now, they're able to get the monitoring out of the way so that on Monday if/when her eyes are mature, we can go home!  Wow!

They gave me a list of things I had to do before I can actually bring her home, sort of like a check-off list. 

-I have to bring in her carseat so they can do their carseat test, which is where she has to sit in her carseat for 90 minutes without having an episode, or without a severe de-sat

-We have to watch a few different videos.....just different things we need to know in case something happens once we get her home

-We have to schedule night to 'room in' with her....they have these two rooms at the end of the NICU hall, made especially for parents who are taking their preemie baby's home.  It's such a nice thing, especially if you're taking your baby home on oxygen and monitors, because you get to spend a night alone with your baby and all the monitors......and if you feel overwhelmed, have any questions, or need help with anything, the NICU is right there.

- We have to take and pass a CPR class

Tomorrow I will take the carseat in, we will watch the videos this weekend....(I wanted to wait until Ova was off so we could watch them together), We're going to 'room in' this Saturday, and we took the CPR class last Thursday.  OMG, it's really going to happen.  My baby girl is really going to come home.  I can't believe it....4 months 1 week 4 days is how old she will be on Monday....seems so long, seems so short.  Finally our family is going to all be together.  Overwhelmed.  So nervous, happy, excited, anxious and sad.  Sad to be leaving this place I've called home for the last 4 months.  Sad to be leaving these wonderful people, the IMC NICU staff, the other NICU parents, the common bonds ladies.......If it were up to me, I'd never have chosen to be handed this experience.....but I'm so glad I was.  My life is forever changed being a mom of a micro preemie baby.  I am blessed.  I am grateful!

I've been putting a few things together for our primary nurses, and for all the NICU staff.....I just feel like I can't thank them enough for everything they've done for my little girl.  Nothing I could do, or make, or give them would be enough.........for saving my baby girl's life.  I am forever grateful and indebted to them.  I'm not sure if we'll be here past Monday, so I've been asking around to make sure my primary nurses will be working before then.  Thankfully all of them are.....except Anjanette.  I haven't seen her for the past few days, so I text her tonight to see when she works again.

Me:  Hey girl....when do u work again?

Anjanette:  I do not work until Tues then Fri, Sat.  Sorry for not visiting u, things have been crazy with my assignments.  How is chubs doing?

Me:  She's good...did u know they switched her to scant flow today and I think they said she's on 1/16th of a liter

Anjanette:  Good girl, I knew she could do it.  So is she here until a least Monday for her eyes?

Me:  Yes....and they said she'll go home on Monday if they're developed....does that mean we won't see you?  :-(

Anjanette:  Could be, but if so I will stop by ur house so I can give u her gift I have not brought it in yet

Me:  Awww...Katea has something for you too!  Gosh, now I'm gonna get all teary-eyed...

Anjanette:  U r silly, this is a good thing and we can still be in contact

Me:  I know, I'm just a crybaby....and I get attached...lol.  Thank you so much for everything!

Anjanette:  Yup.  I should be the one thanking u two for being the best parents and making this time a good experience for everyone.

I cried all the way home.  I know it's a good thing....it's a GREAT thing, and I know we'll keep in touch....I'm just sad that I didn't give her a BIG hug and thank her so much for everything she did for us.  She was the one that took baby from my stomach on the operating table and rushed her to the NICU, she was the one who put her on the breathing machine to keep her alive, she was Katea's nurse for the first critical nights of her life...when we weren't 100% sure she was going to make it and be ok, she's the one that's been there from the very beginning...through everything.  When we first chose her to be our primary nurse, she didn't answer for a few days.....she came into our room one night and told us that she doesn't primary very often because she's pretty possessive, and she is!  She LOVES Katea, Ova and I see and feel it from her.  I'm so so grateful for her....and Meredith, Stacey, Annica and Charise.....all our primary nurses!  I've actually been getting really emotional for the past few days, just at the thought of leaving the NICU and bringing baby home.  Don't get me wrong, I've been waiting for this day since the day baby Katea was born, but I'm going to miss all the friends I've made there.  I was telling Ova that the only other time I had this feeling was when I was getting ready to leave my mission and come home.  As much as I was excited to come home, my heart was sad to leave the people....my friends, the people I had grown to love.  That's how I feel right now, I'm so excited, but my heart hurts that I have to leave the NICU people that I love.  I obviously don't deal with change very well....but one thing is for sure....they will ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS hold a very special place in my heart, and my little miracle Katea WILL know them!


Kassie said...

How amazing Mon! I can't wait til she gets to be home with you guys..

This post is one of the many reason I regret not staying in nursing school and switching majors! I don't regret much in my life, but this is probably the biggest..how amazing to be a NICU nurse and as much of a blessing they are all to you, I'm sure you are all blessings to their lives as well! Especially Katea..I without a doubt am sure you are 'that' family and that baby in NICU that will always have a special place in their hearts as well..how can you not stand out from everyone?! You have been so strong these past 4 months. Amazing. I'm so excited for you..you're going to be great! Love ya

Jenna said...

You are such an example to the rest of us NICU parents. :) I'm so, so happy that you will be bringing your sweet, little miracle home soon and look forward to keeping in contact w/you via fb or blogs. Hope everything goes nice 'n smoothly your last little stretch here!!